Had been a little busy, so I wasn't able to post much. Today, being the last day of 2009 though, I decided it was imperative that I post something. So I decided to plagiarise my favourite book, talking about my favourite person.
So great is His Mercy and Love
As high as heaven is over the earth,
so strong is his love to those who fear him.
And as far as sunrise is from sunset,
he has separated us from our sins.
As parents feel for their children,
God feels for those who fear him.
He knows us inside and out,
keeps in mind that we're made of mud.
Men and women don't live very long;
like wildflowers they spring up and blossom,
But a storm snuffs them out just as quickly,
leaving nothing to show they were here.
Psalm 103:11-16 The Message
I can look back at 2009, and say that I was greatly multiplied, in every way. I am so incredibly thankful to God, and the miracles He has done in me this year. I look forward to this coming year 2010, knowing it's going be even more incredible than the past year because God will do above and abundantly beyond what I expect. This is my prayer for anyone reading this too, that you would be greatly blessed, challenged and drawn closer to God this year.
Merry 'belated' Christmas and have a Happy New Year.
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Friday, November 6, 2009
Risk to love.
"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one. Wrap it around carefully with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket of your selfishness. But in that casket - safe, dark, motionless, airless - it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, and irredeemable. The only place outside heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers of love is Hell." - C.S. Lewis The Four Loves
Love for me has always been a touchy subject. Whether it was the supposedly unconditional love of a parent or the eros love of a suitor. I had decided long ago, probably from a situation where I was rejected and in turn reacted very badly, that no one really loves you. If they say they do, they're probably just lying or they are deluded and don't actually know the true meaning of love. I in turn, built a huge wall around my heart, that I hoped would eventually become impenetrable. I took the verse that says to guard your heart always, to the extreme. My heart was not just guarded, it had a block of brick covered with cement and electric fence with a very strong current, around it. And guards that would give the American President's security team, a run for their money. Since I didn't believe in love, therefore I also could not love. I could not be vulnerable, open and sincere with the people in my life because of that fear that if they get past my heart guard, I would be broken again or they would find a reason to not love me.
When I first met God (as in my first real encounter with Him and not the with the 'religious mean God I had heard of'), He started chipping away at this wall. He could have blown it away in an instant, but I guess He decided to chip it away. For a long time, I just didn't believe, in the core of my heart, that Jesus could love me so much that all my failings, all my weaknesses and the stupid and disgusting things I had done, even with my good intentions, would be as nothing. That God loved me with an everlasting love, that compares to no other by far. It is a miracle, that which God is doing in my heart. Even with the people He has brought onto my path, in the last few years. People who have shown me not only that I can be loved but that everyone can and deserves to be loved. Seeing the depth of His mercy for me and the revelations of His love for me, is changing how I relate to people. I'm finding the need to love more, to genuinely care for people and to stop being so selfish.
I pray that as I grow in His love more and more each day, the overflow will result in me truly loving everyone I come into contact with. I will take the risk (or at least try to), to love people, knowing that I am loved by the King of the universe and to cease from being fearful.
Love for me has always been a touchy subject. Whether it was the supposedly unconditional love of a parent or the eros love of a suitor. I had decided long ago, probably from a situation where I was rejected and in turn reacted very badly, that no one really loves you. If they say they do, they're probably just lying or they are deluded and don't actually know the true meaning of love. I in turn, built a huge wall around my heart, that I hoped would eventually become impenetrable. I took the verse that says to guard your heart always, to the extreme. My heart was not just guarded, it had a block of brick covered with cement and electric fence with a very strong current, around it. And guards that would give the American President's security team, a run for their money. Since I didn't believe in love, therefore I also could not love. I could not be vulnerable, open and sincere with the people in my life because of that fear that if they get past my heart guard, I would be broken again or they would find a reason to not love me.
When I first met God (as in my first real encounter with Him and not the with the 'religious mean God I had heard of'), He started chipping away at this wall. He could have blown it away in an instant, but I guess He decided to chip it away. For a long time, I just didn't believe, in the core of my heart, that Jesus could love me so much that all my failings, all my weaknesses and the stupid and disgusting things I had done, even with my good intentions, would be as nothing. That God loved me with an everlasting love, that compares to no other by far. It is a miracle, that which God is doing in my heart. Even with the people He has brought onto my path, in the last few years. People who have shown me not only that I can be loved but that everyone can and deserves to be loved. Seeing the depth of His mercy for me and the revelations of His love for me, is changing how I relate to people. I'm finding the need to love more, to genuinely care for people and to stop being so selfish.
I pray that as I grow in His love more and more each day, the overflow will result in me truly loving everyone I come into contact with. I will take the risk (or at least try to), to love people, knowing that I am loved by the King of the universe and to cease from being fearful.
Monday, November 2, 2009
Thursday, October 29, 2009
My steps are determined.
In his heart a man plans his course,
but the LORD determines his steps.
Proverbs 16:9 NIV
This past week, I have just been overwhelmed with a sense that God's hand is upon His children, though He may seem far, He always seeks to be intimately acquainted with us and the intricate details of our lives. This includes our dreams.
I can have all these plans and ideas of where I want to go on this journey called life, but God's plans are way bigger than mine, and He is the one who will determine where exactly I go. His plans and his thoughts concerning me are far above and beyond what I can imagine.
I read somewhere where the question being asked was, if you were to die in 24 hours what would you want to be doing in the last say, one hour? The answer someone gave was that they would be playing their guitar. That person is doing the thing they love to do, the thing that God fashioned them to love to do and therefore what they should be doing in life is aligned to them playing the guitar.
I found this in my life, where for so many years I was doing the things, I thought in my head made sense to do. For example, go to college or varsity, get a degree, get an office job, etc. Yet a lot of the decisions I made concerning my career or vocation, was based more on what other people told me rather than what I love to do. What I believe I was born to do. When I started doing those things more seriously, that I truly love to do, that I wish I could take to my office job and spend the day doing (which was very recently mind you), the joy I have felt is inexpressible. There are days when opportunities to learn, grow and do more of what I love to do just fall in my lap. I'm amazed at how God is just opening so many doors, I truly wish I could have gotten the revelation to do what I love, earlier. I could have been getting paid for it by now :-).
My steps are determined by God, I can do nothing else but succeed and be victorious in all the plans that He has for me.
I will lead them...
The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD:
and he delighteth in his way.
Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down:
for the LORD upholdeth him with his hand.
Psalm 37:23,24 KJV
but the LORD determines his steps.
Proverbs 16:9 NIV
This past week, I have just been overwhelmed with a sense that God's hand is upon His children, though He may seem far, He always seeks to be intimately acquainted with us and the intricate details of our lives. This includes our dreams.
I can have all these plans and ideas of where I want to go on this journey called life, but God's plans are way bigger than mine, and He is the one who will determine where exactly I go. His plans and his thoughts concerning me are far above and beyond what I can imagine.
I read somewhere where the question being asked was, if you were to die in 24 hours what would you want to be doing in the last say, one hour? The answer someone gave was that they would be playing their guitar. That person is doing the thing they love to do, the thing that God fashioned them to love to do and therefore what they should be doing in life is aligned to them playing the guitar.
I found this in my life, where for so many years I was doing the things, I thought in my head made sense to do. For example, go to college or varsity, get a degree, get an office job, etc. Yet a lot of the decisions I made concerning my career or vocation, was based more on what other people told me rather than what I love to do. What I believe I was born to do. When I started doing those things more seriously, that I truly love to do, that I wish I could take to my office job and spend the day doing (which was very recently mind you), the joy I have felt is inexpressible. There are days when opportunities to learn, grow and do more of what I love to do just fall in my lap. I'm amazed at how God is just opening so many doors, I truly wish I could have gotten the revelation to do what I love, earlier. I could have been getting paid for it by now :-).
My steps are determined by God, I can do nothing else but succeed and be victorious in all the plans that He has for me.
I will lead them...
The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD:
and he delighteth in his way.
Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down:
for the LORD upholdeth him with his hand.
Psalm 37:23,24 KJV
Monday, October 19, 2009
Hi
Yaaaay, I'm blogging!
For so long, I had been getting the nudgings, (yes, I know that is not a word, it's a Tafism), the invisible elbow poking in the ribs, to start writing a blog. For so long, I put it off, thinking of every reason to not to do so. For example; I feel like procrastinating, so unless there's pressure to do so, I won't or let me go get some ice-cream first. Or who's going to want to read what I write? But I finally gave in. I heard, Just do it and Yes, I can. So I did it.
Anyway, I like to muse, to ponder, to be inspired then to chew on that inspiration, until it is chewless (just got an arbitrary picture of cows and donkeys chewing incessantly on grass springing up in my mind). Writing is my outlet, so this blog will serve as a medium for all the stuff in my head and heart to be released, to inspire, empower, reform and bless others. I love God, and without Him I would be an aimless, sad and tormented person. I am His and He is mine, I live to bring Him glory.
So although my posts might be a little random, (sort of like my thoughts), there will always be musings and they will always come from me, first and foremost, a child of God, a freed soul yearning for more of my Lord. Hence the title, musings of a freed soul.
Enjoy.
For so long, I had been getting the nudgings, (yes, I know that is not a word, it's a Tafism), the invisible elbow poking in the ribs, to start writing a blog. For so long, I put it off, thinking of every reason to not to do so. For example; I feel like procrastinating, so unless there's pressure to do so, I won't or let me go get some ice-cream first. Or who's going to want to read what I write? But I finally gave in. I heard, Just do it and Yes, I can. So I did it.
Anyway, I like to muse, to ponder, to be inspired then to chew on that inspiration, until it is chewless (just got an arbitrary picture of cows and donkeys chewing incessantly on grass springing up in my mind). Writing is my outlet, so this blog will serve as a medium for all the stuff in my head and heart to be released, to inspire, empower, reform and bless others. I love God, and without Him I would be an aimless, sad and tormented person. I am His and He is mine, I live to bring Him glory.
So although my posts might be a little random, (sort of like my thoughts), there will always be musings and they will always come from me, first and foremost, a child of God, a freed soul yearning for more of my Lord. Hence the title, musings of a freed soul.
Enjoy.
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